The first issue is "which god did you have in mind"? If it is a Pascal's Wager choice between only one contender and nothing, that is a somewhat simpler issue. But the truth is that there are not only a variety of competing tables even at the Christian Casino, there are also many other religion casinos just down the block, all operating with their own proprietary (and generally conflicting) house rules.
Did you ever believe in a god, and if so, why did you change your mind? What hope do you have when you and your loved ones die and why are you OK with that?
Q. Tell me about an experience of awe and take me to its source....
A. It is hard to pick a quick example, as I feel awe at so many great physical spaces, such as Brice Canyon, and with music and art (listening to Mahler's "Das Lied von der Erde" does it there).
Atheism comes in as many flavors, just as their are Christians who range from literalist Young Earth creationism believers all the way to those who don't accept biblical miracles or even the divinity of Jesus. But just as one could argue that a "Christian" who doesn't accept the divinity of Jesus is a pretty wishi-washy Christian, so too an "atheist" who has a hankering for some gods is an odd bird indeed.
I often describe myself as a "devout agnostic but a functional atheist." By which I mean that I do not rule out in principle that god(s) might exist (though many a dogmatic atheist does exactly that), though since if asked do I believe in any particular god, as I don't, that makes me a functional atheist.