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An apology from a Christian

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Let me start off my first post for Spokane Faith & Values by apologizing.

I’m a Christian. Unfortunately in this day and age, most times this name is spoken it leaves a foul taste in the mouth. I’m certainly not ignorant of the connotations being a follower of Jesus brings whether it be the image of the conservative homophobe or the condescending fatalist that judges your lifestyle from afar, amongst a plethora of other misleading (but justified) labels. So instead of trying to get you to like me by trying to be deep and intellectual, I would like to receive your forgiveness.

I am sorry if you have ever been hurt by another Christian in any way, shape, or form. If you’re a homosexual, I am sorry that we have made you out to be pariahs and made you feel like you are excluded from being loved by God. The truth is you deserve God’s love more than I do. I feel like the LGBT crowd merits the first apology because from my perspective, those are whom the church has hurt the most in recent times. But I’m not finished by a longshot.

If you have ever been shunned or ostracized by another Christian for your ideologies, be it another religion such as Islam, Hinduism, Mormonism, or anything else, I am sorry. This one goes out especially to you folk who consider yourselves irreligious.  For what it’s worth, some of my best friends past and current are atheists or agnostics. If I’m being honest then I need to confess that I prefer your company over my own brethren many times. Even I get frustrated with Christians from time to time (OK…a lot).

If a Christian has chosen to withhold love or even common courtesy from you because of life choices you have made in the past or are currently making, I apologize for their behavior. Jesus himself chose to pal around and invest in sinners and often condemned those who perceived themselves as saints. After all, it’s not the healthy who need a physician. 

If you have been caught in the crossfire of Christians working out their faith and determining what it is that they actually believe, I am sorry. We of all people are very broken individuals who have at least several, if not many more wrong beliefs and we love to try and put those into practice. Unfortunately sometimes our zeal is misinterpreted or is just flat-out misplaced. 

This last one goes out to all the ladies out there. There is more male chauvinism within Christian circles than I care to admit, and for this I deeply and sincerely apologize. Every guy that does not understand that you are our backbone and does not appreciate you fully is themself an inaccurate representative of Jesus Christ.  If you’ve ever glanced at a passage in the Bible involving Jesus and women, you will plainly see that he had the utmost regard for his sisters.  Not only that but he also loved women so deeply that he empathized with them to the point of tears.  Remember, Jesus didn’t weep when he was notified of Lazarus’ death, he wept when he saw Mary and the Jews crying.

Please don’t misunderstand this lengthy concession as an apology for God, Jesus, the Bible, or otherwise. They need not offer an apology and they certainly do not need me to defend them. Jesus atoned for all sins; I am attempting to atone for all Christians. I am a first-hand witness (and victim) of the damage that we seem so eager to distribute and I am grieved beyond words because of it. There are not enough lifetimes to fully make amends for our actions and I am sorry for this as well. I can only hope to start fresh with you all and tell you about my savior. I hope we can still be friends. If not, I’m going to love you regardless. And for that, I don’t apologize.

Eli Sowry
Eli Sowry
Eli Sowry was born and raised in Southwest Ohio and spent the first 18 years of his life there. Today he is a student at Moody Bible Institute-Spokane where he is pursuing a Bachelor of Science in biblical studies with a minor in psychology.

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8 COMMENTS

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Jim CastroLang
Jim CastroLang
11 years ago

As a Christian Pastor, I appreciate your apology. I would like to hear you clarify what this “love” you talk about means. I understand that it means that lack of courtesy and shunning is not good…it is not what Jesus would have us do. But, how far do you go here. There are many Christian churches that welcome everyone in like LGBT or women. Then later they tell them that they must change their lives if they are to share in Salvation or they are told…because of who you are you can not do certain things in the church. Maybe women can’t be in leadership. The Gay person can not have the love with their partner affirmed. Are you apologizing for these hurts that have been caused by Christians and Christian churches? I need to hear more from you on all this!

Eric Blauer
11 years ago

Eli, you are in a for a interesting ride around here and for the record the line “some of my best friends…” is like blood in the water. Being nice is great and good for you on coming out on the humble bow. But in the world of words…its going to come down to what you believe about a,b,c. and if that smells of fundamentalism or conservativism you are in for a slam dance friend! Apologies for ‘those people’ out there are valid but the real brass tacks truth is what you think and believe about ‘these people’ and that will be exercised out no matter how kind you may present yourself or choose to be. Glad you are here and look forward to see how you fare.

Tiffany McCallen
Tiffany McCallen
11 years ago

Beautiful, Eli! Love your perspective, your frankness and your grace. Welcome to SpokaneFAVS!

Dennis
Dennis
11 years ago

Eric, you are so right about that!

And Eli, I believe you mean we’ll but you can only apologize for yourself and speak for yourself. No one has appointed you as the spokesman for conservative biblical Christianity. You correctly state that no apology is warranted for the Bible, it’s doctrines, God and His attributes or the person of Jesus Christ, and I agree with Eric that you will eventually have to defend your convictions in many areas and that will determine whether you continue to be “friends” around here. I wish you well my brother.

Eli Sowry
Eli Sowry
11 years ago

@Jim- As I said earlier, I am not apologizing for the Bible and what it says. There are clear-cut issues and then there are gray areas inside of scripture. Salvation is the broadest call in the Bible, there are no exclusions, only one prerequisite and that is that we should believe in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. Sinners who come to repentance are still sinners, yet from my experience the church is wary of letting homosexuals in their buildings but have no problem with admitting porn and drug addicts. I am apologizing for the way in which the church has chosen which sins to extend the olive branch to and which sins disqualify them from the body of Christ. Women in leadership to the church at large is a gray-area. I don’t have much of an opinion on it myself being that one of the most influential youth pastors I’ve ever had was a woman. However, I do believe that denying them any place in service within the church is wrong and that is where my apology is directed. Women are filled with the Holy Spirit too and I would be lying if I said I have never been exhorted or admonished by a woman speaking or serving. I hope this answers your question, let me know if you want any further explanation.

@Eric- I want to thank you for your very sobering words. I absolutely agree that when it comes down to it, my beliefs about a,b, and c are going to single me out and arouse either favor or discontent in the people that read my posts, and I am prepared for that. I knew going into this that no matter how much I apologized or tried to prove that I am not your average Christian, I would still come under fire for certain beliefs and opinions. That is inevitable. However, this is not going to stop me from being as committed to the Bible as I can be. There are enough examples in the passages of the Bible that prove some will accept what I have to say, and many will not. I really appreciate your input.

@Tiffany- Thank you for your warm welcome! I am really excited and humbled to be here.

@Dennis- You’re right no one appointed myself or anyone else for that matter as spokesman for conservative Christianity, however I don’t think anyone was ever going to be selected to issue an apology. For a long time Christianity has relied on its appeal to authority to justify its actions but hasn’t had much to say about when Christians hurt others or when the church sins. We want so badly for the world to accept our actions as being right because we see them as God’s commands but we offer little to zero recompense for when we are wrong. Jesus wasn’t wrong however Christians are not Jesus, only representatives of him. Trust me, if I had my way I would have been the last person to write this post. I didn’t see anyone stepping up to the plate however so I took it upon myself. It did not seem prudent to me to continue postponing at least some sort of confession. Whether I was justified in doing so is certainly not up to me but this issue weighed so heavily on my heart that I could not help but speak. If I was wrong for doing this, so be it. I will eventually have to give an account for it. I really appreciate your comment and I hope you will keep me accountable in the future.

Jesse
Jesse
11 years ago

Mormons are Christians, but considering that we are sometimes accused of not being Christians, I understand the apology.
As a Christian, it was good to read this, and now I can make special note in my own life, to make sure that I treat women, members of the LGBT community, and atheists/agnostics with the respect they deserve, being sons and daughters of God.

Dennis
Dennis
10 years ago

Jesse, Mormons are not Christians and have for many years been considered a cult. The definition of a cult is followers of an unorthodox, extremist or false religious system. Mormonism tries to contend on the surface that it is consistent with Christianity, but when examined by it’s own documents and added literature is truly a separate and totally different belief system than true biblical Christianity. Different Father, different Son, different spirit and different belief entirely on the origin of universe and the human race. Totally different expectation of what individual salvation means especially as it concerns futures for men vs. women.

Eli, I respect your attitude for sure, I believe your motives are pure, but your apologizing is too vague to answer specifically. Telling the truth to people can sometimes hurt, but if it is delivered with love and the right attitude, does that require apology? There is much in scripture to instruct the believer in humility, confession of wrong actions or attitudes. We as Christians must stand for righteousness in humility and Jesus said that in this world if we love Him we will suffer persecution. We are not really about seeking for the world to “like” us but to love them enough to share the wonder of the eternal life we have in Jesus, if indeed we are experiencing that wonder. May God bless you Eli.

Eric Blauer
10 years ago

Eli,
Keep walking the walk as you talk the talk, what else can we do? The most humble man was still abandoned, rejected, denied and betrayed and publicly nailed to a cross. Acceptance isn’t really part of the deal, we must be faithful. But, that doesn’t mean we have to posture ourselves as arrogant, know it alls with chips on our shoulders or ugliness in our mouths. Good on you for getting in the mess and trying to love others truth and grace.

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